10 Tips on How to Spot a Liberal

April 4th, 2007 Urban Conservative

I am probably going to get a lot of flack for this but I thought I would have a little fun anyway, generalize a bit and quite possibly offend some of the liberals that read this blog; some of which are my friends and others, well…you know. The following ten tips are not true for all liberals of course, just some quick observations I have made throughout the 30 or so years of my life.  Oh, and feel free to include your ‘top ten’ list for conservatives too, if you dare.

  • They are driving a Prius or other trend-hybrid vehicle to satisfy their eco-snobbery
  • Their car has multiple stickers on the back; namely, “Bush Lied and People Diedâ€? or something about “faith based missile defense systems”
  • They are wearing a shirt with a “peaceâ€? sign; probably with several psychedelic colors and objects. Perhaps a Bob Dylan and/or Beetles shirt too.
  • They have long, un groomed facial hair and they get emotionally bent out of shape when someone brings up President Bush
  • Attend a Cindy Sheehan rally and you’ll be surrounded by them; most likely holding up anti-Israel signs and comparing the Bush Administration to Adolph Hitler
  • Most likely employed by local, state, or federal governments that perform menial tasks
  • They are wearing a tie dye shirt, a fanny pack, Birkenstocks most likely walking around an art & wine festival.
  • Go to the Al Gore movie “Inconvenient Truth” and look around. Most likely you will be sitting right next to one.
  • Most everyone in Portland; especially if they riding a bike or playing a musical instrument on the sidewalk, have several facial piercings and often shooting their mouths off about something ridiculous
  • College Professors at Harvard, Columbia, and Berkeley who believe the US government is responsible for 9/11; YES, they are out there.

This list is by no means comprehensive. Please add to it as you see fit.  Oh, and please spare the hateful comments. For the most part I am just joking and having a little fun; stop being so damn emotional.

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  • bobcatbilly59

    About my Aunt Edna's liver, you can find a wealth of information on accidental cannibalism at
    http://theconservativevoice.webs.com and

    Some pretty oureageous stuff there.
  • bobcatbilly59

    Thanks for the compliment. I think my sense of humor came in my genes...uh oh; I don't think I worded that right. Let me try again. I think it's genetic. My father was a circus clown who traveled with a band of Mennonite gypsies. My mother met him at Red Skelton's funeral. She worked as a nurse for a doctor that performed circumcisions for extra-terrestrials from the planet BlorggghhhAaphahataaah - Glipp and occasionally for beings from the fifth moon of the planet Geggleshptu.

    It's actually quite a romantic story. My Dad, who is a direct descendant of the Molavitch Bulavitch Makemeahsandwich clan from Eastern Europe, took one look at my Mom, who came from her nostrils, and immediately puked on her new $3.00 dress. I guess you could say that they fell in love at first puke. Anyway, both of them are deaf mutes, so the only way they can communicate is by pukes and farts. If my father pukes three times and then farts twice, that means "What time is dinner?" You can imagine what it must have been like for me growing up in that environment. All I heard and saw was fart, fart, puke, puke, puke, fart, puke...it was kind of like a Gastric Morse Code.

    All of this is so ingrained in me that I don't even try to be funny. That can be a real curse. When I got married 300 years ago, I had a slip of tongue and said "Will you be my awful wretched wife?" And she was!

    Naturally I became a conservative because I grew up with a sp sp sp speech imp imp impediment and pronounced liberal as "lipproll." I'd tell people "I'm a lipproll" and they'd do that thing with their lips; or they'd take me to a Chinese restaurant. They never had lipprolls so they always gave me shrimp rolls.

    So that's the story. Pretty depressing, isn't it?
  • AckAck
    You think that's bad, my folks told me I was transcended from Liver Pool and I thought that was that big glob of shit in the swimming pool! Never mind we had Liver for lunch while lounging in the pool! No one ever tied those two together.

    I can 50% relate to the Clampetts, possum was a great dish but we never ate the innerds... That was the other 50% of the tail. Our small animals had to eat to. So, we killed two possums with one stone and fed the innerds to them...

    Grits was never a favorite after my teeth wore out grinding the sand that came off the rocks we used to grind the corn to make the grits. My whole generation is without teeth. We wore them all out eating grits. Should have made it thinner so we could have drank it without chewing... Go figure. Just a bunch of red-necks surviving.
  • bobcatbilly59

    Go easy...I still can't laugh without pain in my ribs. I am really hurting after reading that one about the grits. I did tell you that I ate my Aunt Edna's liver, didn't I? True story.
  • AckAck
    You didn't tell me but I know it's true. I ate my mom's liver to....... Great stuff!
  • bobcatbilly59
    To: DISQUS, Urbandisturbative,

    Why are you forcing me to log in as bobcatbilly?

    Your site is as sloppy as Dora's puke! Your ethics are non-existent. YOU ARE FRAUDS. And you are morons - you banned me frm the site last month! You sent me Fatal Error links.
    =============================FUCK YOU===============================
  • bobcatbilly59

    I am commenting as a Guest! Stop forcing me to comment as anyone else. I do not consider myself to be a welcome member here. Do you understand? Let me repeat it.

  • bobcatbilly59
    Ack Ack,

    ...and JackieM....Dora must be asleep. Sssshhhh. Let's not wake the Sleeping Mouth. Last time that happened we got a projectile vomit that came out of her ear and splattered the whole site. There's something really foul about her liberal puke. We should get her a Puke Bag...you know, like those feedbagas they use for horses. Oh my God! What happens if she takes a crap on us? We'll have to send her to Dr. Libshitz.
  • AckAck
    She is a "Puke Bag!"
  • bobcatbilly59
    Ack Ack,

    You're 100 percent correct. Can you imagine what it must be like for the poor slob that has to empty that bag?


    Nose amputee wanted for position of Director of Stench. Must be willing to empty my puke bag.

    Call Dora at 999-3333-1212

    An Equal Stinquituity Employer
  • JackieM
    bobcatbilly59, you are just hilarious! How in the hell do you do it--get me to laugh so much? LOL! Keep up the good work!
  • bobcatbilly59

    I tried...I really tried, but when I saw the name, I couldn't go home. So...how are you doing, Mouth? Still spewing your usual vomit; leaving it for everyone else to clean? Well, I have a pleasant surprise for you. Now that I have my fingers back and a new coat of skin, I'm confident that I can match your vulgar tongue obscenity for obscenity...oh, that's right, you don't use obscene words. Everything you write is obscene.

    By the way, did you read that list at the top here? You fit the criteria perfectly, but then I guess you are proud of that. Why, Mouth, you're so full of yourself - it's hard to imagine how much space you take up - what did you weigh in at - 450? I think I'm going to change your name to Blubbermouth. Like it? Boy oh boy, this is going to be fun!
  • AckAck
    Bobcatbilly, welcome back to UC. I know Dora is going to be thrilled to know you are back! LOL
  • JackieM
    I wasn't able to get on this site for a while but now I'm back too!
  • bobcatbilly59
    Ack Ack,

    Dora is a schill. She is a paid blogger for UC. This is a fact.

    UC is up their fucked up tactics again. Running me around on sign in and isn't it strange that only UC gets through to my live.com address? Well, since they iniiated the war again, I guess we'll go the same route.

    Urbanconservative is a FRAUD. They are a liberal website posing as conservative; collecting comments for future use against us.

    > Subject: [conservativeblog] Re: 10 Tips on How to Spot a Liberal
  • bobcatbilly59
    Ack Ack,

    See what I mean? Only UC notifications reach this address. I wonder why that is? UC must have paranormal powers.

    Hey, in regard to this thread, check out http://www.theconservativevoice.com Some interesting stuff there.

    Oh, I almost forgot. UC...I rarely carry grudges, but I have one question and one statement for you.

    1. Why is it that only your mail reaches my site?

    2. Fuck You


  • Dora
    how to spot a dimwit right wing nut job:

    they believe in Saint Palin even though all evidences points to her one target in life: Greed.
    Bubble Brain would not dare read this link because it would shatter his little woodie for her:
    and I do mean little.

  • AckAck
    Dora, know how we conservatives spot a "Drooling Liberal?" We just find out where Obama is and look directly behind him... If we listen close enough, we can hear them lapping up on all his crap.
  • bobcatbilly59
    Ack Ack,

    I think you may have got that wrong. "Dribbling Blubberal" has a nice ring.

    Hey, good to read ya.' Where you been?
  • AckAck
    Jackie, I smell Bat Shit! Dora "the liberal bat" just flew by...
  • Chris
    Professors at Harvard are liberal... maybe they have attained more knowledge then you and therefore come up with differing opinions which are more based upon actual intelligence instead of half ass attempts at wit on internet comment boards.
  • JackieM
    that is too funny! if professors at harvard are like obama (hopefully, all of them are not), they have no real world experience and can only talk from a book or their ass so their opinions are garbage. for example, the stimulus isn't working, has been proven throughout history not to be the way to solve an economic crisis, but obama decided to implement the liberal crap to further his agenda and to satisfy his ignorant base!
  • bobcatbilly59

    Professors at Harvard are like professors everywhere. They can't "do" so they teach; and the crap they teach is pure fantasy. Harvard profs will be the last to know that the stimulus is a giant failure. And how about "Cash for Obamacare?" The healthcare package he wants will bankrupt America...forever. Of course, liberals don't care that China owns us. Pretty soon we'll all be marching around with those funny green hats; working at factories where we assemble defective products. What is the new liberal motto? "Buy Chinese?" Damn, I wish I could get one of these nurses to bring me some take-out.
  • JackieM
    bobcatbilly29--I agree. Obviously, they don't believe even the basics of economic theory. if they did, obama would not be in office.
  • bobcatbilly59

    Obama fo fama banana! He shouldn't be in office - he should be impeached. The man doesn't even have a valid birth certificate!

  • AckAck
    Mafia money, thats what the stimulus is. No where did any money go into manufacturing jobs. Manufacturing is where the permenent jobs should have been focused on. Not temporary stuff. The temporary stuff is fine when you have plenty of the permanent stuff. Otherwise, it's blowing in the wind.

    Obama is not qualified to run a lawnmower. I would not allow him to mow my lawn. HE HAS NO COMMON SENSE! Like Dora and the rest of his drooling little tag alongs. His followers put me in mind of the RATS that followed the Pide Piper to their death. THAT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING. They are nasty little rats! Billy and I talked about it a little, you know, the brainwashed segment?
  • vesey
    liberals are also elitist education snobs.......................
  • bobcatbilly59

    Right on. For some good info in this regard, check out these links:


    You sure said a lot in only 6 words! Hope you keep posting.
  • JackieM
    well, i can say that there are a lot of us conservative republicans that are educated but we have the one ingredient that liberals are missing--common sense. without that an education just makes someone stupid, i.e., obama! i agree the liberals are education snobs but they are the most stupid people that I've ever met.
  • AckAck
    Joel Bowman, reporting from Taipei, Taiwan...

    We've never met a statistic without split-personality disorder. Viewed in one light, for instance, losing 11,000 jobs in a month is relatively dandy for the US economy. It looks, prima facie, as though her job(less) market is bottoming out...that things could soon be on the mend. And lo, her unemployment figure even dipped, down from 10.2% to "just" 10%.

    But wait just a minute, we hear those skeptics say. How could this be? How might an economy lose jobs and simultaneously witness a fall in the unemployment rate? Well, those figures don't allow for the people who are simply "defined" out of the workforce. For instance, the number of "discouraged" workers - literally people who have given up looking - increased by 53,000 to 861,000. In other words, more people "left" the official unemployed pool than joined it...even though they didn't actually find a job. Incidentally, that's the most "discouraged" workers since the recession began...which is pretty discouraging.

    But why would people stop looking for a job when there's a recovery underway? Don't they watch the news? Good question. Maybe they went home for the holidays to sleep on Ma and Pa's couch...or maybe they're waiting until after Christmas to renew their efforts...maybe they're just fed up with getting knocked back...

    Or maybe it's all of the above...

    According to the Department of Labor report, the number of long-term unemployed (those jobless for 27 weeks and over) increased by 293,000 over the past month to 5.9 million. Two in five unemployed people now fit into the "long-term" category, up 2.7% from last month.

    Statistics, you see, are rarely as straight-faced as they first appear...particularly when they end up on websites ending in "dot.gov."
  • amber3
    says the ignorant hick
  • JackieM
    amber, keep up your uneducated blabber! it is not becoming of any American. I guess that is why you anti-Americans voted for obama!
  • AckAck
    Jackie, Anti-Americans are an out cast. They're not only enemies of the country, THEY ARE MY ENEMIES ALSO!
  • JackieM
    AckAck, I agree. All you have to do to nail them is to ask where the jobs are and how many campaign pledges obama has broken. Most of his supporters are too stupid to understand and the others will make up more lies to attempt to cover for him.
  • JackieM
    AckAck--of course, we could talk to them about why obama's economic plan was doomed to fail but they don't give a damn about actually solving the problems in this country. obama doesn't either and this can be proven by who is attending his jobs "summit" and by the lame speech that he gave today. liberals (anti-Americans) only want to spread hatred and destroy this country with their agenda!
  • JackieM
    AckAck, this administration is nothing but a joke to this nation. now obama is making a half-assed PR campaign to target small businesses when everything they are doing is the direct opposite of helping them. if people buy this, it just goes to show how dumb America has become. i hope Americans start to understand that everything that comes out of obama's mouth is bullshit and bad for America. The anti-Americans (liberals) want to destroy America anyway so this is just part of their agenda.
  • AckAck
    Jackie, here is a letter from our "Oklahoma Health Care Task Force." The author is Senator (Dr. MD) Tom Coburn, Republican.

    Dear Bud,

    Harry Reid and Senate Democrats have proposed slashing Medicare funding by nearly $500 billion to help pay for their government takeover of health care.

    Many Senate Democrats will deny the harm done to American seniors by these cuts, but you simply cannot cut $500 billion from Medicare without affecting the quality of care.

    These cuts include $120 billion from the Medicare Advantage program; $150 billion for providers including hospitals, nursing homes, and hospices; and $23 billion in unspecified cuts to be overseen by a government advisory board.

    American needs health care reform that lowers costs while increasing the quality of care. Please join me and my fellow Republican Senators as we try to stop these irresponsible reductions from American seniors. Sign the petition today and pass it along to five of your friends so that we may stop Harry Reid's bid for a government takeover of health care today. His plan comes with a price tag we cannot afford to pay.


    Dr. Tom Coburn
    U.S. Senator (OK)
  • AckAck
    Amber, you appearance here used to be good for a laugh, now it hardly merrits a giggle.
  • Willy
    I must say as someone who leans slightly conservative......You need to put more effort into it next time. This was weak.
  • JackieM
    i've never met a person who is slightly conservative but then again i don't like people who are wishy washy. you either are a conservative or you are not. you either like idea of selective births and believe we are not all created equal or you don't. you either want more welfare or you don't. you either are for fiscal responsibility and capitalism or you are not. you either believe in this country's founding principals or you don't. it is pretty simple.
  • shellyk
    I would think on this topic for few minuets." Gods Don't kill people, People with Gods kill people!". I don't think that it is a matter of funniness.
    off road camper trailers
  • adrian monk
    According to "Dot",
    I know how to tell if your neighbor is A liberal. They let there children run around the neighborhood day and night destroying property. Disrespect for adults have no fear of police. We cant spank them you know. If it feels good do it no matter how it my affect the community. They let the grass grow as tall as your head. They don't want to cut it because it might destroy the Eco system.

    Here is how to spot a Conservative that hurts Conservatives more than any lefty-lib(one that fills every stereotype in the book).....

    It's Dot!

    One that calls other parents "irresponsible"/"uncaring" etc...  , and to call "any liberal's" children disrespectful...

    ...Yet was not even responsible enough to learn, as a "respectful Conservative" child, the difference between "there children" and "their children"?

    "Them there kids...." -- is that what you meant to say?

    They are "vein people"?
    I thought we all have veins?????
    Are you conservatives perhaps,maybe, aliens from a different planet? You don't require a circulatory system?

    People like you disrespect our entire generation of humanity, along with those that came before us.
  • JackieM
  • Jones
    Liberals are usually people that got to correct the spelling in simple e-mails and do not pay attention to the underlying point of the e-mail.  Liberals are usually the ones that are throwing frisbees in the park during a work day.  Liberals are usually the ones that feel that Farenheit 9-11 has truth in it. Liberals are usually the ones who have more than one bumper sticker and often put conservative politics down.  Liberals are the very same people that come up with childhood cartoons like "Dora the Explorer", "Little Einsteins" and "Mickey'sPlayHouse".  I mean c'mon what is the deal with all the colors in the rainbow in the show?  Liberals are genuinely the very people that think "Lord of the Rings" was the greatest trilogy ever.   And one huge way to locate a mass of liberals is to walk down Sunset Blvd. on a sunny summer afternoon.
  • Robbie
    Dont forget that
    1. the men look like women and the women look like men
    2. they think "critical thinking" is a board game
    3. they claim that they believe in "sticking up for those who are too helpless to stick up for themselves" while saying it's okay to kill the most helpless in our society (unborn children)
    4. they believe the hard-working should be punished with heavier taxes
    5. they are the ones who haven't thought of such mundane details as to "who is going to pay for all this" when they come up with harebrained ideas.  It just sounds good.
  • Zippy
    Gods Don't kill people, People with Gods kill people!

    And it's taken less than 100 years for "godless" Communists/Socialists to surpass them in the murder category!

    Keep relying on man to have all the answers!
  • Amelia
    this is sooo funny.
    I'm very liberal but these things always make me laugh.
    There is definitley a little bit of truth in them though.
    I love the Beatles and have tons of BumperStickers.
    I also love lattes, The New York Times, Tofu ect.
  • Dot
    Liberals lie they say the are accepting of people they hate fat people and they hate religious people ,people that have any morals. They are not good natured they are rude . They have no consideration of other peoples feeling . If you don't look or weigh A certain way they hate you. They are vein people. If your not A vegetarian they hate you. If you are not in to drugs they hate you.. They are all around hateful people .
  • Dot
    I know how to tell if your neighbor is A liberal. They let there children run around the neighborhood day and night destroying property. Disrespect for adults have no fear of police. We cant spank them you know. If it feels good do it no matter how it my affect the community. They let the grass grow as tall as your head. They don't want to cut it because it might destroy the Eco system.
  • d
    After reading everyone's comment, I believe the best comment made has been:

    Comment by Preston
    July 20th, 2007 7:51 pm MyAvatars 0.2

    I find many liberals to be:

    1. Open-minded.

    2. Caring.

    3. Invested in world issues.

    4. Questioning (rightly) of authority.

    5. Considerate of diverse peoples and cultures.

    6. Idealistically (un)motivated.

    7. Creative and/or appreciative of artistic talent.

    8. Free-spirited.

    9. Accepting.

    10. Good natured.

    Whereas conservatives can often be described as:

    1. Uncompromising.

    2. Caring.

    3. Grounded in immediacy.

    4. Patriotic.

    5. Proud of their own culture and background, and wary (rightly) of religions ripe with extremist sects, and cultures contrary to their way of life.

    6. Pragmatically motivated.

    7. Productive.

    8. Morally-strict.

    9. Steadfast.

    10. Good natured.
  • @RGB

    Really. I never would have guessed that!
  • RGB
    You forgot to mention the entire city of Madison WI...

    Lots of automobiles covered with bumper stickers there.
  • Doodee
    Thanks for sharing
  • who cares. The beatles sucked and so does their music.
  • adrian monk
    Obviously you've probably not heard the beatles (well, actually George wrote it) song "Taxman"
    Lowell: Actually many people without Gods have killed people. Stallin, Mao, Pot were all Godless and killed over 100 million people. You need to read Santayana, he has some interesting things to say about not knowing your history.
  • Gerald - thanks for sharing.
  • Gerald
    Many people view the problem with the entire country as a simple Tug-O-War between liberals and conservatives. I think people of all persuasions would find it easier to work together if our current 2 party system did not require the allegiance of politicians to their party, over their allegiance to the general good of the nation. Abolish the influence of the 2 party system, and things would get much better much sooner. Abolish all campaign contributions. Rather fund a series of in depth, televised debates as well as single candidate questions and answer forums, and suddenly the special interest money doesn't decide our elections anymore. Let the people see each candidate in a federally sponsored series of 30 minute, televised, question and answer sessions rather than a few hundred 30 second sound bytes whose content is dictated by opinion polls. Have a panel of ordinary people ask the questions rather than today's political operatives so thinly disguised as reporters. Everyone on both sides of the Liberal - Conservative issue knows examples of these operative/reporters all too well on both sides of the spectrum. The constitutional protections of a free press assume that the truth is far more important than political agendas. Today's press on both sides of the political spectrum should remind themselves of that fact on a regular basis. Today, in the United States, we have the best press in the entire world whose point of view can be purchased by special interest groups. Again, the 2 party ( party allegiance above all else ) system has allowed this unhealthy influence of special interest groups to creep in. Change will not be easy; it will be difficult to say the least. But then again, neither will be our downfall be easy, it will rather be difficult to say the least. Know however, that difficult as a mere word fails to sufficiently describe our fate unless we choose to address our underlying problems.
  • William Rennick
    i find most 'liberals' are up-inflecting burb-billies.
  • gail - thanks for the grammar lesson. Maybe you should trade your Jag in for a Prius! : )
  • Another Michael
    Pardon the tears while I type this, my store ran out of Birkenstocks, and I think I got some tie-dye in my eye.

    I'm really not sure why ideologues feel the need to vilify each other. I'm not particularly fond of conservatives at the moment, but I attribute that largely to the amount of mud-slinging that's become popular in the last few years. Politics has never been a pretty place, but in the last ten years or so it's gotten positively lethal.

    I suppose that, given the way liberals dominated the political landscape for so very long, conservatives had to adopt a more extremist attitude in order to get attention. The natural liberal response was, "what? What the hell was that about?" Now we have conservative leaders in office who consider it their Constitutional right to lie to the nation in order to achieve their goals. We have other conservative leaders elected on moral platforms they themselves can't uphold. We have conservative pundits slandering political opponents as "flip-floppers" while they themselves shift stances to justify the means to their ideological ends. The hypocrisy is staggering, and yet the core conservative crowd maintains a cheerful, "everything is going according to plan, but liberals are still to blame" policy while public sentiment shifts away from them like an earthquake.

    Seriously, folk. Polemicists like Ann Coulter are not helping to create a civil dialog between ideologies, they're just mocking each other and creating more hostility. The last thing we need is a jihad declared between conservatives and liberals.
  • gail
    I'm a liberal with a M.A. in English. I drive a Jag. Actually Conservatives used to be against government intervention; the definition has been skewed. Also it's "too" in "to many cats" because "to" is a preposition. If you're going to mock, try to use correct grammar.
  • 10 Thing to Do, if You do Spot a Liberal - FROM ANDY

    1. Say "Hi!"
    2. Smile, or generally be congenial
    3. Do a funny dance
    4. Whistle
    5. Paw at his/her breasts

    My list

    6. Hand him/her a tissue since they are always crying about something!
    7. Refer him/her to a therapist
    8. Call a priest so they can perform an exorcism
    9. Give them some prozac
    10. Bail them out of jail for protesting at a Cindy Sheehan rally!
  • Cate - your list is so funny! I appreciate that you can have fun with us conservatives!!
  • Lowell...go away. You are not wanted here!! lol.
  • Sera

    I found this cartoon more accurate and funny, but still relevant.
  • Jason
    Yes Lowell, people with gods (plural) kill people spiritually.. So if they would just have 1 God, YHWH, all would be swell... From where does flow the stream from which existence itself has floated? What is the source of existence itself? Not matter, existence? Evolution? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... Philosophically evolutionists are lacking, getting hung up on minor details, they miss the big picture.... So what is your theory of the origins of existence of ANY kind? Because physical matter cannot produce EXISTENCE... Why CAN anything exist? What made it so matter CAN be? OF course your answer will just be as biased as you claim that mine is... But in the end, you won't have one.

    "If nothing can be known, then I cannot know that, therefor I prove that I know nothing." -Aristotle
  • Reverendjohn
    It's unair to compare G W Bush to Hitler. Hitler's dad wasn't an arms dealer!
  • Sabra
    Please don't judge me by my tie-dye! I just think the patterns are pretty. Really. (And I hate having to second guess wearing it for fear folks will mistake me for a liberal. Perhaps in the future I should only pair my tie-dye skirt with my "Peace Through Superior Firepower" t-shirt.)
  • Lowell
    Gods Don't kill people, People with Gods kill people!
  • Edson
    Ann Coulter is a flaming c*nt. And I'm not even a liberal!
  • Becks
    How can you NOT like the Beatles? That's one of the four requirements to be considered a mammal! Covered in hair, live born, mammary glands, AND a Beatles fan!!!
  • Preston
    I find many liberals to be:

    1. Open-minded.

    2. Caring.

    3. Invested in world issues.

    4. Questioning (rightly) of authority.

    5. Considerate of diverse peoples and cultures.

    6. Idealistically (un)motivated.

    7. Creative and/or appreciative of artistic talent.

    8. Free-spirited.

    9. Accepting.

    10. Good natured.

    Whereas conservatives can often be described as:

    1. Uncompromising.

    2. Caring.

    3. Grounded in immediacy.

    4. Patriotic.

    5. Proud of their own culture and background, and wary (rightly) of religions ripe with extremist sects, and cultures contrary to their way of life.

    6. Pragmatically motivated.

    7. Productive.

    8. Morally-strict.

    9. Steadfast.

    10. Good natured.

    There is nothing to say whether the pragmatist or the idealist is more correct in their world view, and it is rare that a government allows both to strive for their place in creating a free and true nation.

    Where do I stand?

    I'm pro-choice, though I believe that a woman makes her choice long before conception, and that abortion is amoral except in very narrow circumstances, such as rape or the endangerment of the life of the mother.

    I believe in the separation of church and state, in that this is a democracy, and not a theocracy, but none the less founded on the ideals of Christian morality, to include the morality of most major world religions.

    I accept the theory of evolution and also the hand of God in the creation of our world, and that God has set the parameters, or works within the boundaries, of the laws of nature, but also that modern science does not have a full understanding of the universe, and that science and faith are not mutually exclusive.

    I see vast corruption of the intent of the law and our government on the part of both major parties. A major part of this degradation is financially and agenda driven. It is by the hard-working, diligent patriots and idealists, and through the grace of God, that our nation continues to flourish. Like my own religion, the people in government may not be perfect, but the form and ideals of our beloved government are top notch.
  • Scott

    "-They pass by the homeless people on the streets and change the channel on the Save The Children commercials"

    A conservative is much more likely to give to the needed on the street than a liberal. Not that there aren't exceptions to every rule mind you...

    ... I did laugh at yours too, btw.
  • Andy
    10 Thing to Do, if You do Spot a Liberal

    1. Say "Hi!"
    2. Smile, or generally be congenial
    3. Do a funny dance
    4. Whistle
    5. Paw at his/her breasts
    10. You fill in these for fun!
  • Cate
    10 Tips On How To Spot A Conservative
    (Again, all in good fun)

    -Driving an SUV or otherwise environmentally ridiculous gas-guzzling monstrosity

    -Despite His entire lifestyle and point of his life, they think Jesus is a Republican and they frequently play this card to justify presidential actions ("That's God's man, God's president up there")

    -They hold their morals, of course, above all else...except those Swiss bank accounts...oh, and those white-collar crimes...

    -When little Johnny sneaks into his grandfather's arsenal and shoots up his elementary school, their mottos are "Give him the death penalty!" and "Guns don't kill people, people do."

    -They get incredibly defensive any time George Bush is mentioned.

    -Their bumper stickers include "Don't Mess With The U.S.", "Don't Be A Girlie Man, Vote Republican", a pro-Dubya sticker, and the ever-popular "God is a Conservative."

    -Wearing a suit, tie, and a fake smile, with a Bible in their briefcase (that they haven't read in much detail lest it disband most of their worldview)

    -They pass by the homeless people on the streets and change the channel on the Save The Children commercials, complete with a lecture to any nearby ears about how "those people just need to go get a job...why, I got my first job at age 15, and by the time I was 22 I was C.E.O. of my own company..."

    -Characterized by a distinct inability to laugh at themselves. After all, if you mock a Conservative, you're mocking GOD, right?

    -It is unlikely that they are able to see things like sunsets and paintings, because their view is constricted to only black and white.

    Your list is funny, too. All in good fun. :*)

    Have a great day!

  • Norski
    "hackneyed stereotypes of liberals"? Maybe.

    But isn't it odd that yours are stereotypes, while remarks like "poor, uneducated, and easily led" don't generally get that label.

    One thing: Spelling and syntax are vital for credibility. As a poor, uneducated, and easily led person, I've learned to be quite careful. One must be careful about one's intellectual reputation, after all. ;)

    My responses:
    1) **Funny**
    2) Worth a Technorati "Favorite"
    3) Must have been effective, seeing what fell out of the tree
  • Lori
    They think it's hilarious to mock the current President, Vice President, Secretary of State, etc., but bare their teeth if you bring up facts supporting areas where the previous administration was truly (as in, via actual documentation) corrupt. And PLEASE, do not ever disparage or otherwise show your opposition to Hillary or Obama, as it is completely inappropriate in the eyes of a liberal to judge, question or badmouth anyone who is or might be considered A) female (unless it's Condoleezza Rice), B) African-American (unless it's Condoleezza Rice), C) gay, lesbian or bi-sexual (unless that person is a Republican), or D) of any religion EXCEPT Christianity or Judaism (Christians and Jews, of course, are expected to be belittled regularly).

    They're probably Socialists and will tell you they don't mind paying extra taxes to have free health care. Of course, it's likely that they don't pay much in taxes as it is (at least, in my family). And by the way, they want that health care to include unlimited access to their favorite pet “birth control” method, better known as abortion.

    They honestly think the debate about global warming is over, that Hillary and / or Obama possess leadership qualities, and that the media is biased ... against liberals (but honestly, I think that's just because Fox News and Rush are "allowed" to be on the air).

    They believe the US is the bad guy in everything that is wrong with the world and that if we leave Iraq, peace will abound. So they are not only naive, they are dangerous.
  • Jen
    Another way to spot a liberal? No sense of humor or ability to self-mock. Yes Monorail and Becky, I'm talking about you :P
  • Michelle
    great list!!!!!!!!!!! I am soooo laughing right now. I work in San Francisco and often travel to Portland....lol. I see this all the time.
  • Dan - Ann Coulter is quite humorous but I don't get your point. Please elaborate.
  • dan
    This is funny like Ann Coulter is funny. Like, not. And pointless. It's "not even wrong".
  • Richard Avalos
    CLASSIC...this totally made my day.
  • Ironclad
    Another symptom is illiteracy, - as demonstrated by the inability to use "then" and "than" correctly Becky.
  • Monorail
    Should have been titled "list of hackneyed stereotypes of liberals".

    Could counter with a equally silly list of how to spot a conservative, things like, the rapture bumper stickers, their ditto head opinions, ect, but what would be the point aside from insulting people who are really my fellow americans, and although I might think they are missguided, I realize they are doing what they think is right. I believe that our shared country is in trouble, and perhaps this is a time to pull together rather than driving each other furthor apart, but you'll do what you want, good thing we aren't at war or anything.
  • BlackBalled
    haha ... so very true.
  • Becky...lol. Sorry. As you can see, I am not a big Beatles fan...and, I am just having some fun!

  • becky
    At least spell the Beatles correctly. If you are going to mock liberals or any others then the conservatives, at least try a bit harder to get the stereotypes right. We aren't all like that.
  • 5.56mm
    Men with one to many cats are always suspect.
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